LETS TALK ABOUT GUYS!

Guys. What pops into your head when you read that? you probably have a mixture of a million different emotions and experiences and all of a sudden you’re thinking about that guy who played your heart, or that guy who left you or that guy who won over your heart. You want to laugh and cry and punch but also you want to hug them and tell them, “thank you for everything.” Guys can be so confusing. So what makes me qualified to write about them? Absolutely nothing. If anything, my track record would actually make me unqualified hahah. I’m just an average young adult but I’m also someone who is following a God who is anything but average and is revealing to me His way of navigating this whole guy thing. And it’s wayyy better than anything I’ve read on books or magazines or any tips from other girl friends who are just as clueless as me.

I’m not going to get into the whole “embracing singleness as a gift” thing right now cause that would need to be a whole different post. Today I want to talk about what we typically want in a guy and why we want it and if maybe just maybe we need to change it and change ourselves and our perspective on it. First things first, if you have some long list of requirements for your future husband, that’s awesome but you better be working on yourself too so you can check off the things on his list. Do not sit around waiting for him and then once y’all are dating decide to start being your best self. It just doesn’t work that way! Work on YOU while you have time and energy to invest in yourself and then y’all will both reap the benefits as a couple later on! It’s becoming way too normal for girls to expect God to give us an amazing guy who has all these great qualities and will lead us well and all we have to do is sit on the sidelines and wait. NO! Become the type of person you want to attract.

So what is attractive to us? Y’all already know physical attraction is huge if we’re honest and yes it is important but I don’t want to be a wrinkly 80 year old looking over at my husband and knowing that the #1 thing that brought us together was looks. Looks have a place but they don’t last so they don’t satisfy the true desires we have for a relationship. Even without the Christian aspect, it’s just shallow to base a relationship off of purely outward appearance.

So what should we look for on the inside? Lucky for us God literally listed out characteristics of love the way He designed it. Patient, kind, doesn’t envy or boast, is not proud, is not self seeking, is not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, doesn’t delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres. If the guy you’re interested in doesn’t fit that list, you shouldn’t even be considering him. Duh no one is perfect but if he is truly chasing after God, those characteristics should be present and evident in a significant, obvious way. God doesn’t want you to settle so if you’re trying to justify dating someone who doesn’t match up with this, those thoughts aren’t coming from Him.

And if a guy ended up reading this post then same goes for you when you’re considering a girl. Just because you’re supposed to be the leader doesn’t mean it’s okay to settle for a girl who is lukewarm spiritually. Check their inside by seeing what comes out of their mouth and their actions day by day in how they live their life in every circumstance. If y’all date they will influence you and you deserve someone who will build you up rather than bring you down.

I have a list of 3 things that are non-negotiables. I really encourage that you make your own or even use this one as a way to stay focused and accountable to the ultimate goal of having a Christ-centered marriage someday.

1.) Are they pursuing God at the same pace as me. Can I serve better with them than without them?

2.) Are they someone I can have a friendship with and have conversations and be vulnerable and trust?

3.) Attraction mentally, spiritually, personality?

I hope that you feel comfortable enough with God that you can talk with Him about everything, even guys! He desires a deep relationship with you and cares just as much about the little things as the big things and will shape your heart to be more like His as He reveals to you the way He wants things to be in your life.

Re-Spark That Fire with Him!

“…and if you could just pray that the flame will spark and stay on fire and that I develop a strong desire to have a firm, strong relationship with Him again…”

This is from a dm I received from a friend that inspired me to share to you! I pray God moves through my writing but also that real growth occurs through genuine conversations that are started by it.

It’s a common thing heard when people talk about wanting to be on fire for Jesus! The problem is, fires eventually burn out. However, someone told me that “if you want a fire, you have to put in one stick at a time”.

So if the desire of our heart is truly to have a relationship with God, we will keep putting in sticks so the flame doesn’t disappear.

A “stick” is just anything you do that gets you closer to God. Maybe it’s praying, reading a bible, listening to worship songs, or meeting with a friend and doing a bible study together etc etc etc. Believe me when I say this, when you draw near to God and He will draw near to you. What a beautiful promise God given us. One of the pastors once said, "if God seems far away, guess who moved?” which is such a great reminder that although we definitely can’t work our way to heaven, we still need to put a work in order to be closer to Him and become more like Him just like we would do for any human relationship. How much more should we desire to do so with our Heavenly Father who loves us so much deeper than any human ever could!

I’m not doing this blog thing to give tips to people who I can’t relate to. I’m literally just thinking of topics and talking about whatever pops into my head from what my reality is and what God has shown me and I know 100% that I need to read and apply my own words more than anyone else does.

With that being said, some days I feel like I can only put in half a stick. My recent excuse is all about work work and work, the most exhausting way. It takes a lot out of me physically, mentally, and even spiritually and some days I just feel drained when I have to add even just little life things on top of it. It’s ironic because even though I know God will fill me up, I still use feeling empty as an excuse to not make time for Him. Yet I think scrolling through social media or standing in a hot shower for way too long will help. My point here is, it’s not about having time, it’s about making time.

Chances are I don’t know you on a deep level so I do not know what your excuses are and they might be wayyyy bigger than my current one. I just know we all have excuses or we would never feel the need to re-spark that fire with Him because we would be content with drifting from God. Wow I pray hard for me and for you that we never end up in that place. Lately I have tried to start looking at my excuses as motivation. The fact that I’m even making an excuse means I’m obviously feeling a conviction that is requiring a response which means my soul knows I need to spend time with Jesus even when the enemy’s lies try to convince me otherwise. 

So my prayer for myself, for a friend who messaged me, for you, yes you and for anyone who reads this is that we will listen to that conviction and desire to chase after God knowing that He can and will satisfy us and fill us up so we can pour it out onto others and that we will be realistic and realize that it will require throwing in some sticks day by day.

OBEDIENCE (GENESIS 22:1-18)

This is the story of Abraham and Isaac. So Abraham was praying to God for Isaac. Isaac was a good thing and Isaac was a gift from the Lord. It's amazing in this story, this is when God calls Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, his one and only son. Abraham was called to obedience. 

Starting from verse one, it says, after this things God tested Abraham and said to Him,"Abraham!" and he said, "here I am." so "after this things" what does it mean? what's the context that leading up to this point? well Abraham was going through previous trials and testing of his faith. Some he succeed and some he failed it. So he already been traveling and going through all this testing of his faith. He was going on a mission, a journey of his faith. So he was facing his previous test and God comes and says, "after this things". God tested Abraham.

God tests us. The reason why God tests us, He puts us in this kind of situation of obedience, because He wants to see if we truly rely on Him, it reveals the genuineness of our faith if we are really going to respond His call of obedience. When God tests us, it strengthen us, to mature our faith. We grow deeper into relationship with Him through the testing process. We get to rely on Him and get to know God even better. That is the purpose of testing out our faith. He reveals more who He is, who we are, and who we become.

So Abraham is standing there and says, "here I am Lord, ready to hear from you." God calls Abraham and Abraham responded. When God calls you to do something, what is your reaction? just run up and say here I am what do you want me to do? I am going to act and I am going to obey? or you just run away? don't miss out on that calling. When God calls you say here I am like Abraham did.

Going to the verse two. it says, He said, "take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you." When I read that, I was like, that's exactly what the Lord is telling me to do. "I want you to give it up to me because I said so." But it's beautiful we see in verse three, "so Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him." When the Lord command him, he woke up the next morning, he did it even without an explanation. Remember, Isaac was a good thing that the Lord gave him. But God wanted to see if Abraham desired God over the things that God gives him.

Our generation, we worship the created, but we don't worship the creator like we should. So when God calls us to sacrifice good things, "oh God but my relationship is founded on you." But God says, "yes, but you are not worshiping me, you are worshiping this relationship that's founded on me." 

If we are idolizing the things and doing things of this world over spending time with the Lord and if you don't want to give the things up and experience the relationship with Him, that's idolatry. Do not put the things of this world in place of God. I am not saying Isaac was necessarily an idol, but in this situation that was a testing of faith. That's how it was for me. I realized I was putting a lot of my hope in that relationship where I should be putting my 100% to the Lord.

God is not gonna call you to do something and not come through. He will come through. So even when obedience doesn't make any sense to you, if He is calling you to do something and you are saying, "why Lord why are you calling me to do this and that?". Just trust Him and He will come through, He will answer those promises that God made to you. When we give God our whole heart, we will receive the whole blessings. How do you expect the whole blessing if you only giving God 95% of your heart? What is that 5% you are holding on? what is that 5% you are clinging on that is keeping you from enjoying 100% of God's blessings? He desperately wants to do a good work in each and every single one of you, but I guarantee you that there's something 5% or 25% or maybe 100% that you are holding on that you just need to give over to Him and trust Him with. It's gonna hurt for sure, but God will comfort you.

Paul calls us to run the race. We need to run the race. But we can't run the race if we don't discipline ourselves to walk in obedience. How can we run the race if we can't even step (one step) to obedience? There's no way to do that. We have to take an initial step. If we want to fulfill our purpose and bring Him the glory which is what we created to do, obedience is all we need. Not just walk in but run it.

First initial step of obedience that the Lord was calling me to do, that was hard. Giving up the relationship I had was really tough. But when I first took that step of obedience and I said, "okay Lord, I took that step." And He said, "okay here's the next one." And I said, "okay God you did a good thing with this step, I am going to take the next step and so on." Before you know it, you are going to be running the race, you are gonna set your eyes on the prize and you are not going to even think twice about obeying. 

It's going to be hard to take that initial step. Trust me, running the race is very hard. It takes a lot of discipline and I believe we can all agree with that. But it becomes easier, the more that you have eyes focus on the prize and the promises that God has for you. Your eyes fixed on that, not the thing that this world or around you said might be tempting you with. You have your eyes on Jesus, you are going to run to the light.

You become more aware of what God has for you. But the only way you gonna see the Lord fulfilled His promises, if you step out in obedience. If you want to experience God's way, the crazy way, the way that Abraham did, if you want to experience the glory of God like that, you have to step out in obedience. We want to see God moving our lives, working in our lives. But we have to be willing, we have to give Him 100% of our hearts. We have to let go of the 5% that we're clinging on to. And we finally have to let it down.

Whatever the Lord is laying on your heart right now, I want you to do it. I want you to be proactive so you can experience the glory of God right now. Just like Abraham, "here I am, whatever you say, I'll do it Lord." Because what's the point of saying, "here I am Lord, I want to hear a word from you." And you just turn your back on it. You have to allow Him to influence you and you have to let Him in. That's your own choice.

I want to run the race with obedience. I don't know about you, but I want to run the race as fast as I can and I want to experience the glory of God. I want to step into the will of God, every step that I can while I am here on this earth, while I am still able to do the great ministry.

Don't miss out on things that God has for you. Run the race in complete surrender. He doesn't want you to miss out on any good things. That's why it breaks His heart when we fallen into temptation and when we settle for the things for this world. Don't settle for anything when God has excellent things for you because it's not worth it.

Start with a big prayer asking for big things, expecting big things, but you also have to step into obedience. Give God 100% of your heart and you will receive 100% of His blessings. We are living active breathing just because of God. I am seeing the fruit today and that is just encouraging me to run even more.

Seeing what He has done for me, I can't even imagine what's next right in front of me. His plan for you and me, I just don't know. But I pray for all of us that God will call us and challenge us to lay down the things that not from Him. I pray that we can all lay down 100% everything because we don't want to miss out anything that God has for us. God, if more of you means less of me, I want you to take everything from me. Love on us Lord and comfort us and give us boldness to lay down those things. You are God of promises, show us your way so that we can experience your glory and let us run the race in obedience. Make it clear to us and give us the first step today, in Jesus name Amen!